Hope Deferred

Sometimes life seems so unfair, especially when we are doing our very best to please God. The mistakes and choices from the past sometimes appear to choke the very idea of a better future. Circumstances that seem never to change convince us that there’s no point in hoping for something better. However, if we stay the course and assign the events of our lives to God’s time instead our own, there’s never room for impossible.

This feeling is magnified when it comes to our children. As mothers, our very heartbeat is in cadence with our kids. We want nothing less than the best for them and with every heartbreak they experience, it chips away at the core of who we are, propelling us to a position of action. However, what do we do when the disappointment is caused by the very DNA that is a part of their existence? What do we do when the rejection they feel is due to a choice we made?

Take a look at Carolyn O’Bryant’s story …

Early Thanksgiving morning, while Minister Eugene Howe was preparing a video of family pictures, he began to wonder about children of his oldest brother – a boy and a girl. He had not seen his brother for some years, and he was curious about the nieces and nephews he had not met.

There were rumors of nieces and nephews but nothing concrete, so on Thanksgiving morning he looked on the Internet for information. Ten years ago, he was told that his brother had a set of twin girls, but it was only talk. While on Facebook he came across the name Bryant, but the name did not ring a bell until he saw the first name, Carolyn. Seeing this name prompted him to look further and realized that the name was O’Bryant. Because this name sounded familiar, he did a search for Carolyn O’Bryant. 

After looking at Carolyn’s page something clicked. The rumor he heard was about twin girls, but what if it was twin boys. The Carolyn O’Bryant he knew had twin boys that he met over three years ago on a mission trip to McDowell, W. Va.  He had also met Carolyn a year prior on a mission trip to the same location. At this point, it is 3 a.m., and Minister Howe wakes his wife to ask her if she remembered the rumor and if she knew Carolyn. He needed to know somebody who knew Carolyn personally because he wanted to ask her some questions.

As God would have it, his wife is childhood friend was a mutual friend of mine and at 7 a.m. they called asked her questions about his brother, my sons and myself. The friend didn’t know the answers to all the questions being asked, but she did connect Minister Howe with me. 

Later that morning I called, and after talking for awhile, it was no longer a rumor; his brother was my son’s father. Minister Howe invited my boys and me over and on Thanksgiving day, my sons were finally able to meet someone from their father’s family. My sons’ father never took an active role in their lives, and I don’t see it ever happening, but I praise God for allowing not only one of their dad’s brother to step up but all three!

There are choices and decisions we’ve made that have left us feeling regret, but even then, God has a way of making the outcome better than we deserve – even when it does not come when we think it should. God’s grace is not contingent upon our deeds or time; God’s answer is not delayed, but it’s not premature. Carolyn’s sons didn’t meet their paternal family until they were 17 years old, but it came at a time when they were mature enough to understand and accept the truth. His grace will sustain you as you wait. So no worries …  your past is not determining your future. Your future is just being orchestrated by God’s bigger plan!

Remade by Grace



Tylunda Greene